Wait...before you proceed, I am on my most cruel punch bag routine and have taken it all out on my blog this time. If you do not have it in you to handle office politics (which is a yummy pizza with a 'lying' base, 'cheesy' layer, undesirably informative but proactive toppings dabbed with lots of sarcasm and a dash of purely evil fun), please do not proceed any further! I have taken liberty to thrash a few individuals, particularly one....so you're welcome to have fun at their expense! Now read.
no no wait wait....*strong* (a little bit!) language and bloody violence warning. Reader discretion advised! Now read on.


This write up/story is a record on the incidents, events, mishaps, you-name-it related to an individual whom we can safely call ‘ruffled feathers’. This is not a work of fiction, any resemblance to characters living or dead is purely intentional and has nothing to do with coincidence.
Our story shall involve a host of other characters, but with regard to their privacy (and my own personal safety); their names have been changed.
Our story starts in a desolate building in a dingy street.
Now in this rather brooding building sat a small little team of software engineers, who were forced to believe that their one true mission in life was to work and be benevolent; benevolent when you have to give away all the laurels for your work to your boss! Then you had the module leads or MLs, who were SEs who had been SEs long enough and threatened to either quit or cause mortal damage to their bosses. To tame these frustrated and dangerous creatures, the new ‘role’ was introduced recently. They were paid the same as the SEs and got no extra benefits, only a different name and the impression that they no longer belonged to the entry level. And of course there were those who were a little above the poor downtrodden engineers, those were the lower middle management, the ‘Leads’. Now what they did lead (apart from miserable lives) is a totally different story. But their job was to peep into the SE’s monitor and ring the emergency alarm if they found anything like Yahoo, Google or even Blogger open, to intimidate their boss (we’ll get to him later…and by the way, they did not have to bother about Orkut as that was blocked already!). They were code named *a$$* kissers (A.K) for the obvious reasons.

And then the person who sits on top of everyone…actually everyone’s head. The manager guy! (TMG) The most marvellous creation of god and dare I say equipped with the best of all modern instruments! They considered dropping Daniel Craig and signing him for his ease with gadgests and gizmos, but re-considered once they had a look at him. Plan B is to cast him in a remake of E.T in the title role. He knows everything that goes on in the cursed cubicles of the SEs. He has spies all over the office floor. He has a RADAR which covers every nook and cranny of the floor…Nope, hiding in the emergency exit stair case is not going to help, unlike mobile networks, his RADAR is strong. He responds to only 2 people and is answerable to only them. His two bosses, one, the guy he calls boss and another, his actual boss, his wife.

So, you might be wondering where does ruffled feathers (RF) fit in? She (yep, that’s a woman!) was an A.K. But a frustrated one at that because she believed it was time she replaced TMG. Her frustration normally showered on the hapless SEs, particularly a new one (fresh meat Aka FM) who had just joined the team. He put it up with her obviously because he was under the false impression that she actually knew something. Which was later clarified by his experienced team mates. And then there was Villain, her colleague and yet another lead in the same team. Villain was RF’s sworn enemy, but that doesn’t make him good either. Had he been a filmi villain, he would have been Prakash Raj, a bit confused, psyched out and a vicious one. He also happens to be TMG’s top most spy and added to that took great pleasure in usurping the credit for the efforts of the SEs. But he played it so cool with them that not one doubted his noble intentions!

P.S: Will be back with more bitching. Till then, drop your rotten eggs, tomatoes in the comment section. I'd return them without fail, in all my true-scorpio self, one day in your blogs.

Song on: Money (P.Floyd)
Mood: Crazy

Labels: Office, RF

Posted by Sat at 7:47 AM
24 comments

24 Comments:

Typical Sat post... after many many days :D
enjoyed reading it.... Infact was visualizing it as I was reading it... :D
Very true about the AK's... Is there any project without an AK atleast???

By  KK, at 10:12 PM, February 05, 2007  

indha AK matter UKya kooda vittu vaikaliya? adhu seri, enga thaan ille !!
it definitely is omnipresent :(

//
Now what they did lead (apart from miserable lives) is a totally different story.
//
ROTFL :)

//
actually everyone’s head.
//
LOL :)

A serious topic said very hilariously. pizza matter was damn good thinking Sat :) you sure have a gr8 narration syle.

i sent u a friend request in orkut and learning now its blocked !!!a

By  Arunkumar, at 11:20 PM, February 05, 2007  

you have got a very good style :) romba azaga aabeesu mattera peter kilappi solli irukeenga...stylish post...

pizza explanation was excellent...
kalakkunga

By  Swamy Srinivasan aka Kittu Mama, at 4:35 AM, February 06, 2007  

attendance AVP :-)

By  Syam, at 9:35 AM, February 06, 2007  

//They considered dropping Daniel Craig and signing him for his ease with gadgests and gizmos, but re-considered once they had a look at him. Plan B is to cast him in a remake of E.T in the title role//

hahaha...chancelanga...i can almost see u gunning all this with ferocity in ur pc :D :D chancela ponga...enga aapicelayum oruthan iukan.but jus one fellow...oray oru dog matum intha mathiri..rest are all gems

By  gils, at 11:56 AM, February 06, 2007  

AK's r common everywhere....in all offices....in all professions! Just chill gal! :)

By  Has to be me, at 2:37 PM, February 06, 2007  

KK;
hehe....i thought i had been playing miss-goody-2-shoes for long.
there's no place without AKs. infact there shouldn't be, howelse are we to be entertained?!

Arunkumar;
idhu UK india engenalum nadakum, idhellam manushanukke uriya gunangal....idhuku naadu, madha bedham edhuvum illa!
aama :(
orkut pakkam poi romba naal aachu :(
en virodheenga yaaradhu andha pakkam vandhu kevalama scrapina kooda theriyadhu :(

By  Sat, at 6:13 PM, February 06, 2007  

Kittu;
Thank you thank you :D
edho paakura velaiku veettu vaikama irundha sari!

Syam;
Porumaya vaanga :)

By  Sat, at 6:14 PM, February 06, 2007  

Gils;
koduthu vachavar neenga....aapees amaivadhellam iraivan kodutha varam :)
but idhuvum jolliya thaan irukum. enga vedanaya nenachu naangale sirichipom. andha team vittu vandadhulendhu life-e bore aagi pochu. andha maari nut cases engayum paaka mudila, thedi pidichu engendhu appadi assemble pannangalo....

HTBM;
you are right...they are present everywhere. that's the truth. i've got nothing against them. in fact, they are my main source of fun in the office...and i am thankful that they are so abundant :D else this chain of posts (yes there are more to com, god save u ppl) would never have come into existence! owe it all to them

By  Sat, at 6:18 PM, February 06, 2007  

//
en virodheenga yaaradhu andha pakkam vandhu kevalama scrapina kooda theriyadhu :(
//
naan scrap pannadhu thappunu solringala ille enna virodinu solreengala? :P

By  Arunkumar, at 7:02 PM, February 06, 2007  

Surely having these people is fun... currently I dont get to watch such fun... Days used to fun watching the AK and ET (Yeah, I had a ET only not a Daniel Craig)... Its more fun when you try out some Dilbert techniques... One technique from Dilbert I tried was... asking for an award :D... It was total fun to fight why the AK needs an award...

By  KK, at 9:10 PM, February 06, 2007  

Small correction:
Days used to be fun

By  KK, at 9:11 PM, February 06, 2007  

ROTFL! Idhellam konjam over, sila pala bloggers-oda roles-ayuk thakkara madhiri iruku ;) aanalum parvalla, it was fun to read it!

By  KC!, at 2:11 AM, February 07, 2007  

Arunkumar;
Ada...illa sir...but you haven't done anything like that have you....aiyo naane idea koduppen pola irukke!

KK;
aaahaaa....KK...indha vela ellam nadanthu irukka
it's really fun driving them to their wits end, just we need to be careful we dont get frustrated. avalo thaan :D you can have a hearty laugh about it any day

Usha;
Neenga solradhu correct, but i am criticizing only a few individuals...and sooner or later even I would be on the recieving end of such things if I repeat those mistakes :)
idhu ellam mere stress buster-e :D
nothing very serious!...unless the people concerned read it, then it's a different story for me :))

By  Sat, at 2:52 PM, February 07, 2007  

Aiyyyaaa...Jolly i am not in IT :D I cud see those lines puffing smoke thru my laptop screen! :D

I liked ur sign off lines :)

By  prithz, at 6:03 PM, February 07, 2007  

Oru 10 naal kazhichu vanthu partha ithana posts-a? Medhuva padikurren..

By  Anonymous, at 8:14 PM, February 07, 2007  

//we need to be careful we dont get frustrated.//
I did it because I was frustrated :D
but now thinking of it.. seems fun :)

By  KK, at 6:14 AM, February 08, 2007  

Prithz;
hehehe....but not to worry...IT is something I can relate to hence it reeks of it. These characters are around everywhere. Wow...that felt so much better :P

Karthik;
:-O
You were missing for a month!
good to have you back... :D

KK;
hehehe....sometimes we do have to unleash all of it on those unsuspecting ppl....and it's undiluted fun anytime :D

By  Sat, at 7:54 PM, February 08, 2007  

KK;
BTW, did you win the argument?

By  Sat, at 8:36 PM, February 08, 2007  

Yeah, Kinda... made ET to blurt out the real truth :D

By  KK, at 9:58 PM, February 08, 2007  

Bravo!!!!!
All hail KK! :))

By  Sat, at 11:05 PM, February 08, 2007  

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